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Monday, July 16, 2007

Create your own Friend Test here

everybody, i'd like you to meet my alter ego. HER name is Isabella.
-hii~!-
i gave her the pass to my blogger account just to fill in for me =D
have fun~

I am Isabella
well, i shall start by posting about Nat's day.
hmm today he had a racial harmony celebration in school.
it was fun. or so he said.
well that's not the main point.
Nat's sad. and depressed.
down. he doesn't seem like he's getting up soon.
i don't understand why he's like this.
i don't think anyone will be able to.
day after day, he wakes up and puts on a mask.
a mask of smiles, laughter peace and joy.
beneath the mark, the worms dig deeper.
the scar across his face runs ever longer
and he just dies that much more.
he wishes the world would understand him.
well, that is if anyone cared.
he knows everyone has heard this many times.
life is unfair.
day after day, finding a reason to live becomes more difficult
because day after day, every reason fades away.
life is thinning. and so is his patience to himself.
he doesn't blame anyone or anything for this.
he doesn't want the world to worry for him.
he just wants to stay inside and find his way out.
every night, he sits in his dark corner.
thinking about life.
he feels it's really stupid.
to have such feelings and thoughts without reason.
he reads the bible page after page after page.
trying to quieten his heart to let the Lord speak.
but he feels it's silence.
he guesses that the Lord might have abandoned him.
though he knows, he's in there somewhere.
he wishes he would just leave this body and life behind,
move to a better place,
forget all his troubles.
he swallows every drop of saliva ever harder.
he knows there's really nothing out there
but a fire in his heart,
burning through the thin layers of his will to live.
why? why do this to himself. he asks.
he could just leave it all, move to a better place.
he longs for true love, true friendship, true trust.
he just wishes everyone would have patience with him.
he sees his life slip infront of him. yet he can't do a thing.
it's just like being locked up in a cage, he told me.
you see the world dieing, polution, global warming.
you just want to get out and tell the world to stop.
but no, he's encaged. he can't do anything.
and yet people plead him to stop.
the zoo keepers, they hold the key,
yet day after day they tell him to get out of the cage
he can't take it anymore, or so he told me

It reunited at 4:06 AM