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Thursday, January 17, 2008

Wondering the streets, in a world underneath it all

Nothing seems to be, nothing tastes as sweet

As what I can't have

because sometimes the pain cuts through me just like a beam of laser, cutting through the peaceful surface of the water. it turns the world upside down, and suddenly you're looking down, thinking about how life would be, how life should be. and suddenly you realise it isn't about that at all, in fact it isnt about you. because you keep everything to yourself, because everything's about you. because i don't want to care anymore, yet i do so much

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

and cannon ball into the water

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

For you I will

because i'm just so lost inside, to risk the attempt of climbing, or enjoy the freeness of falling. both brings about their consequences. you don't have to understand, nor do you have to care. infact you can click that big red cross now. nothing you do here will matter. i'm going to set my sights away from you, as far from you as possible.

Forgive me if I stutter

From all of the clutter in my head

Cuz I could fall asleep in those eyes

Like a water bed

Do I seem familiar, i've crossed you in hallways

a thousand times,

no more camouflage

I want to be exposed,

and not be afraid to fall.

soon i'm going to be invested and though it doesn't seem big to anyone it means so much to me because of what i had to go through to get to where i am now. and there's so much more to go. all the pain and tears and the hours of hardwork to be here, and yet you just turn away and not give a damn. i said i'm excited you said you couldn't care less. i said i want you to be there you said you're not free, rather sleep. i said it means alot to me you said sleep means alot to you. i said you're mean you said i'm taking up your time. i start to cry you turn your back and walk away.

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

And cannon ball into the water

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

For you I will

You always want what you can't have

But I've got to try

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence

I haveFor you I will

For you I will

For you

because sometimes the cloud covers too much, and it blinds us from within. because sometimes all you need is someone beside you through day and night. friends, yea they're there forever and i'll love them forever, that's for me at least. but someone to be there is way more important than that. your unwillingness to accept me and to believe me and to even try to understand me digs deep. so i'll just sit here for the rest of the night, staring up into the cold night sky, cold, but warm. and he will hug me in my times of needs unlike you, and he will be there for me all night. until the sunlight comes up and takes away the warmth from the air and replaces it with the cold harsh reality of life and pulls me back into this hell. and i'll try my best to get up and walk again, and you know i'll succeed. but you'll just have to push me down when i do i guess.

I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have

For you I will

It reunited at 3:58 AM